Ferocious Flirting: Making Marriage Wonderful

What better tradition is there than being expected to kiss your sweetie for no other reason than just standing in the right spot? If you don't have any mistletoe hung up, go get some soon. Christmas is almost here and you don't want to miss out. Be sure to put it somewhere where you will often be together. Even better, get two, one for the bedroom and one for the kitchen (or wherever you often meet up). Now to the good part, the kissing. What sort of kiss should you do under the mistletoe? As many sorts as you can think of. One time give her a peck on the cheek. Next time, give her a toe-curling whopper. Be sure to mix it up with kisses to her cheeks, lips, nose, hands, neck, etc. Whatever you do, do not become predictable. Keep her guessing how she is going to be kissed next. Spice up your repertory by throwing butterfly kisses and Eskimo kisses into the mix for a greater variety of surprises. Also, add various other aspects to the kiss. Perform one kiss while ho

Admit it, there are some "secrets" that you share with your sweetie. Not the "dirty laundry" kind of secrets, but the fun secrets that no one knows about. Things like that one song that is "your song" or that little restaurant that no one knows about but has a great Italian food and the accordion player on Friday nights. The secret discoveries that couples share over the years are what these shared secrets are all about. One fun shared secret can be a movie. It needs to be a movie that is not the most popular movie du jour. It needs to be a movie that no one knows about, or its not a secret. It can be a fun independent movie that you see at some film festival. Also, DVDs can make for some "shared secret" movies. Just be adventuresome and try a movie you have not seen before. Romantic comedies are often the best for a couple who want to enjoy watching a movie and being together. If you want a suggestion, let me recommend "Our Hospita

Maybe its just a guy thing, but I love to give my sweetie extravagant gifts. Maybe I hark back to the caveman days when bringing home a squirrel would keep you from starving but not much else. However, a woolly mammoth will keep your sweetie well fed and warm for a quite while. Also, its an ego boost to have my sweetie show off my latest purchase. Come to think of it, its not just a guy thing. My sweetie loves to lavish me with expensive gifts and toys. Maybe its just that we get such enjoyment out of seeing our sweetheart happy. And obviously the more money I spend the happier she will be. Right? I have learned to keep these Neanderthal impulses under control. Buying an expensive gift can do more harm to your romantic life than it does good. Often, a small, but thoughtful token of love is better than an expensive one. Seems counter-intuitive so lets explore. First, take into account the family budget. If you spend so much on a gift that it adversely affects the cash flow si

When was the last time you danced with your sweetie? If you are like most couples, you can't remember that far back. Tonight, clear a spot and find some music of varying tempos. It is as important to have some up-tempo music as well as the "bear hug" music. Then, spend a few minutes dancing with your sweetheart. Dancing is great for your both your hearts - the physical one and the romantic one. For the physical heart, it is a wonderful aerobic activity that will get your heart rate up. It burns lots of calories and gets those endorphins going to make you feel good. But don't forget the romantic heart. By the end of just a couple of dances you both will be smiling, laughing and really enjoy being with each other. Not only that, there is a lot of touching: hugs, holding hands, the "bump" and so on. No better recipe for romance was ever written. What about the kids? Unless you have teenage sons, they will be jumping right in. Kids know a good time w

With the weather getting colder, scraping frost off the car windows is becoming part of the morning ritual. If your sweetie has to scrape the frost off the windows before leaving, you have a couple of opportunities to surprise your sweetie. One thing to do is to write a message to your sweetie in the frost on the windows. The message could be a heart with both your initials in it. Keep it simple and short so the letters can be large and easily seen. On another day, sneak out and scrape the windows for your sweetie. Leave a note on the steering wheel. Something like: "Your smile warms a frosty morning".

My sweetie has been under the weather the last few days. Being the gallant husband I am, it is difficult to not be able to don my shiny armor and ride to her rescue on my snowy white steed. Many times during our marriage I have felt helpless because there is nothing I can do to "make it all better". No matter how many dragons I might slay, my sweetie is still going to have a cold. I have learned that just because you can't fix it all, doesn't mean you can't do something. Last night that something was buying a dozens roses that were on sale at the store and renting a movie. Even though I can't make it better, I can remind her I am thinking of her and her needs.

Find a time when you need to ask your sweetie a question. Instead of just asking it, write it on a piece of paper. Preface your question with a compliment like: Sweetie, You have lovely eyes, I am so lucky to have you. Where is the sugar? XOXOXOX

During the years of a couple's marriage, they gather momentos. These little tokens of particularly special times in our lives don't cost a lot. However, they can mean a lot to a couple because the the memories associated with them. Life is busy and this little things can get lost or overlooked. Get yourself a box for these little treasures. Make it a nice box, like a jewelry box. Put all your special trinkets in the box. Then on your anniversary, open the box and share those moments again. Make a point of adding something new to the box at least once a year.

Days off work are precious things. We only get so few a year that we often hoard them. To completely surprise your sweetie, take a day off work just to spend together. You need not have any special plans, just spending a day together can convert the most mundane chores to into quality us time. Of course, if you can do something to get away for a few hours, that would be great to. Sometimes the kids get a day off from school. For a special family time, take one of those days off and enjoy the day with the kids as well.

In this list and on others you will see many wonderful ideas for expressing love and gratitude to your sweetie. Among all these ideas is a common thread: go one step beyond the normal. Instead of saying the word, "I love you", write it in a note. Instead of just saying "thank you", send a thank-you singing telegram. Why bother? A couple of reasons. First, when you do something outside the ordinary and unexpected, you place yourself at a certain amount of emotional risk. Your sweetie will sense this. This moves you both outside of your combined comfort zone and adds excitement to the relationship. The comfort zone is comfortable but boring. By moving both of you outside of that boring place, a simple yet extra-ordinary act is a simple way of adding excitement to the relationship. Second, as the saying goes, "it is the thought that counts". The more thought and preparation you put into sending your message of love and gratitude, the more it will co