Thursday, May 22, 2008

2 Steps to Keeping it Interesting

My kids will often say "I'm bored" to which I reply "Whose fault is that?" Boredom and apathy are relationship killers. Just like my kids, we often try to blame others for our own boredom. And like many other things, we need to take responsibility and address it for ourselves.

If you are in a rut, here are two ideas that will make life more interesting. These also work to keep your relationship from falling into that rut.

First, most everyone likes pleasant surprises. A gift or a thoughtful act will let your special someone know you are thinking about them and will get their attention. We all get complacent in our little comfort zones and a fun surprise on occasion will keep things interesting. If you need an idea, head to your local greeting card shop. My kids got me a card that plays the Charlie Brown theme when opened. We open it and dance around. Find a card that will make your sweetheart laugh and send it to them for no reason. Write something like "I saw this card and it made me think of you". If it is one that plays a fun song, even better.

Second, by developing your own interests and talents you will become a more interesting person. People love to be with interesting people. Sadly, people will put their own interests, hobbies and passions aside. Start taking time to develop your own talents and encourage your spouse to do likewise. Make a goal and then develop a plan to reach that goal. For example, if you are a runner, set a goal to run at an organized event. Then make a training plan that will help you be ready.

Be sure your goals are realistic both from a physical and a relationship perspective. If you are 7 months pregnant it might not be the best time to be training for a marathon. Neither would you want to schedule your time that would prevent you from meeting your responsibilities.

Simple surprises and a plan of personal growth will work to keep your relationship fresh, fun and interesting.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I think you missed a major cure to relationship boardom in this piece. Every relationship has its ups and down. I feel like during those ups, I spend the most one-on-one time with my significant other and feel the most bored. Married or in a relationship, we have all seen friends disappear from the social scene when they find that special someone. The same thing happens to you and me. The cure is finding people (couples) who share your interests and bring out the talents and goals your significant other doesn't. Its OK to admit that our significat other isn't our perfect match or "better half". Other people, friends, can bring out in you character traits and talents, that your partner was never aware of. These same people break up the monotany and routine of a relationship and reinvigorate your time together.