Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Safety First

A post called blackout suggested having a pretend blackout. It can be a lot of fun, especially if you tell family stories or stories of your childhood around a small light. Our children really eat it up.

The tip for today is to go over one of the safety checklists from the Safety Tip page at Safe Kids. Be sure and make it fun. Maybe a practice fire drill with everyone crawling on the ground with blindfolds on to simulate a house full of smoke.

Its not a very romantic topic, I admit. But saving a life or preventing an accident can be very romantic.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Date Idea: Geocaching

If you have a GPS a fun date or family activity can be geocaching. Never heard of geocaching? Think of it as a giant treasure hunt. People have "hidden" various objects all over and registered their coordinates on a wed-site like http://www.geocaching.com/. You go to the web-site, put in your zip-code and get a list of objects hidden in and around your city. Each has the coordinates to find it using a GPS as well as a description like:

Placed in a park stip in West Bountiful. Weary travelers rejoice!
This small tupperware is in camo to hide it well. Shouldn't be too hard to find otherwise. While you'r around, stop in next door and grab a burger and some cheese curds at the A&W. Happy Hour is 3-5pm when drinks are half price. Or if you advnture down the road there's a great taco stand.

Your task is to find the treasure from the clues provided. Be sure and leave the treasure at the spot for the next person to find.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Today and Forever

I Corinthians 11:11
11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.
On television and in movies we often hear the person officiating a marriage ceremony repeat the phrase "until death do you part". Does the relationship between man and wife really only last until one or the other dies? Are we not together as husband and wife in the here-after?

During the Easter season we remember the resurrection of the Savior and the hope it gives for a better here-after. For me, that hope includes being with my beloved companion for all eternity. As it says in Corinthians, "neither is the man without the woman". When the time comes that one of us passes on, that parting is not forever. Instead, it is just a sort time until we can be together forever.

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Romantic Movie Ideas

My last post on Audrey Hepburn reminded me of a problem we have had our whole marriage. The problem is trying to find a romantic movie at the rental store. As you probably know, a movie that is too violent or a movie that is too explicit or too offensive can really kill the "moment".

What to do? I am starting a Romantic Movies database and placed the link on the right side-bar. The database will contain movies that my sweetie and I have watched together and both like. What it won't contain is:
  • Any R-rated movies.
  • Any movies that we found offensive.
We like all kinds of movies from all genres. The list is fairly small today, but will grow as I get more movies add. Check it out!

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Audrey Hepburn

Its usually not a good idea to talk about other women when you are trying to be romantic, however in this case I will make an exception. Audrey Hepburn was in a lot of classic movies like: Charade, My Fair Lady, Sabrina and Wait Until Dark. If you are looking for a great romantic movie to watch together with your sweetie, these films make great choices.

The Amazon ad here should list a bunch of her movies that are on sale for a good price, but it sometimes doesn't seem to work. You can use this link to search Amazon for Audrey Hepburn movies.

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

What I Did for My Anniversary

We went out to lunch at a great Japanese restaurant that has wonderful chicken and reasonable prices. Then we went and got my sweetie's favorite dessert at a different place. The dessert cost more than the Japanese meal. Go figure.

In the evening, we had dinner with the kids. Then we sent them to watch a movie on the downstairs TV while we went in our room, locked the door and enjoyed my sweethearts gift to me: Hogan's Heros: The Complete First Season. I had forgotten how much we enjoyed this show. We ended up watching a bunch of episodes.

All in all a wonderful anniversary.

Monday, March 21, 2005

Date Idea: A Long Lunch

As the children get older, it can be hard to find time to be alone with your sweetie. Children have school, sports, friends, homework, and so much more. The parents end up spending a lot of time driving kids to events, watching sports and performances and encouraging them in homework. When is there time for each other?

One way to be alone together is to have a lunch date. A previous post discusses sending a note to work in your sweetie's lunch. Today's tip is to make arrangements to have lunch together. If you work close enough to home, a lunch at home can be fun and inexpensive. If not, you can either pick up your sweetie at work and go someplace close to work or you can arrange to meet each other at a restaurant.

It can be a lot easier to get together for lunch than for dinner, especially if the kids are in school.

Friday, March 18, 2005

Date Idea: GPS Scavenger Hunt

Scavenger hunts have been discussed in a previous post on Valentines Scavenger Hunts. With new technology, we can up date the scavenger hunt by using a GPS (Global Positioning System) receiver. A GPS can tell you within 10 feet where you are anywhere on earth. They have a lot of uses and can be real fun.

For the scavenger hunt, get the GPS position for several memorable places from your courtship and marriage. Examples include where your first date was, where you first kissed, where you were married, and your favorite restaurant. Once you have the location of each place, there are several ways to do the scavenger hunt.
  • Leave your sweetie the GPS and a note to go to the first location. At that location, have another note directing them to the second location and so on. Be waiting at the last location which could be a restaurant, theater or even back home.
  • Do the same as above, but rather than having each location be some spot from your past, make each location part of the evening. Give them a list of locations and what to do there. The list would be:
    • Location 1: get flowers
    • Location 2: get dessert
    • Location 3: get dinner (have it pre-ordered)
    • Location 4: get romantic (be waiting here)
  • Give you sweetie the list of places to go and the GPS and let them navigate while you drive. Make them give you directions; pretend you don't know where you are supposed to turn. The list of locations could be memorable places from your marriage or part of a progressive date: restaurant, theater, dessert, home.
Mr Obvious says: make sure sweetie knows how to use GPS before sending them alone on a scavenger hunt. Also, have some way for sweetie to contact you in case of getting lost.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Go With Him Twain

In Matthew 5:41 it says:
41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.
This is often referred to as "going the extra mile". Do more than is necessary or asked of you.

How does this apply to romance in marriage? There are several aspects that could be explored, but a simple example will suffice for today. I am serving as "Toastmast" in the Toastmasters club I meet with. With St. Patricks day, I decided to decorate the room with a pile of gold coin candy.

My sweetheart was headed to the store and asked if I needed anything. I mentioned that if she came across some of those candies to pick them up for me. Well, she was at the store for quite a bit longer than I had expected. Turns out she had to go to half a dozen stores to find the candies. She also got other St. Patricks day decorations for me to use.

Thanks sweetie! You are great at going with me twian.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Date Idea: Watching the Sunset, Part II

A previous post discussed a romantic date centered around watching the sunset. Today, I continue the idea using a different approach.

Most cities have restaurants that have great views of the sunset. A fine meal in a romantic setting can lead to sharing a memorable evening together. Maybe even surprise your sweetie with a small gift or card expressing love and gratitude. Give your gift as the sun sets.

Finding a good sunset-viewing restaurant is not all that hard. Hotels and other tall building in town are good places to start. Ask friends and family for good restaurants with a view. Sometimes out-of-the way restaurants have a nice west facing window.

Finally, sometimes these restaurants are "go there for the view" restaurants. The food does not have to be good if the restaurant has a great enough view. If that is the case, consider going there for dessert. That way to whole evening is not spoiled but a poor quality meal.

Monday, March 14, 2005

Passion

Do you have a passion in life? Passion, like most English words, has several meanings. When you are passionate about your sweetheart, it could mean ardent love. People can also be passionate about other things. In this sense, passion can mean boundless enthusiasm and that is the meaning for today.

What are some of the things you are passionate about? For me, my passions include family history, my sweetie and offspring, physical fitness, chess, improving my marriage, Toastmasters and computer programming. These are the things I like to do, enjoy doing and choose to do when I have some spare time. This blog is part of my passion in making my marriage great.

What does all this have to do with romance in your marriage? Just this: sometimes in marriage we abandon the things we are passionate (boundless enthusiam) about in favor of passion (ardent love). For a healthy relationship, each partner needs to develop their individual interests and talents. Also, each needs to wholeheartedly support the other. This does not mean you have to enjoy your sweetie's hobbies, just that you make sure they have your support in pursuing them.

Take time for your interests, passions and hobbies. Ensure that your sweetheart has time to develop personal interests and hobbies as well. Part of a healthy relationship is growth, as individuals as well as a couple. Change is an important part of growth, so remember to fall in love, over and over as you each improve your talents and pursue your passions.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Date Idea: Candlelight Dinner for Two

To add romance to a meal, try adding candlelight. We associate candlelight with special occasions so when you add candlelight to an ordinary meal, it becomes special. Of course, using the fine china, a table cloth and preparing a special meal (or getting take out) adds to the sense of romance. Don't forget to dress up, even though the meal is at home.

Why do we like fire? Whether it is the flicker of a candle, the warm glow of a camp fire or the blaze of a bonfire, most people love fire. The flicking flames add a dramatic flare to a meal. The dancing shadows add a sense of energy to the meal, a romantic dynamic if you will. The glimmer of the candle catches the eye while it casts a flattering glow upon your sweetheart. All these visual clues equate to an enhanced sense of wonder and mystery.

Everyone seems to look better in candlelight. Every notice how a flame seems to make your sweetheart's eyes twinkle as they smile? The natural light of a fire seems to draw out a natural beauty in the skin that is otherwise hidden under artificial lighting. A burning candle seems to put people in a better mood, which makes them smile more.

A candlelight dinner is wonderful as a couple only activity. If you can't have the house yourselves, maybe you can arrange it somewhere else, or even outdoors. Also, a special candlelight dinner can be fun for the whole family.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Laughing is also good for you

For years we have heard that laughter is the best medicine. I even wrote about laughing in a previous post entitled Laugh a Little. Now there is some research on why laughter is good for you. An article, Laughter May Be Good for the Heart, Study Finds, in the news states:
A daily dose of laughter may be good for the heart because, like exercise, it makes blood vessels work more efficiently, U.S. researchers reported on Monday.
While not a replacement for exercise, laughter, it seems really does have some physical benefits to it.
Of course more research needs to be done in this area, but the conclusion of the study is still interesting. The study only included 20 participants so drawing any conclusions at this time is premature. Yet, it does serve to remind us to laugh together as a couple and a family. Not a funny person? Need somewhere to find funny anecdotes? One of my favorites is Reader's Digest. Each issue has a lot of humorous family-friendly stories. They have also published some of the best of the stories in book form. Of course there are lots of Joke of the Day websites too.
Laugh. Together. Often.

Monday, March 07, 2005

No Strings Attached

Do something for your sweetie with "no strings attached". Let me give you an example of "strings attached". First, the wife cooks the husband's favorite dinner to butter him up so she can ask him to take her shopping. Also, the husband get very helpful with the chores so the wife will feel better about him going out with the guys. Admittedly, these are stereotypical examples but they help to illustrate the point. The point being that we often try to manipulate our sweetie by doing things for them so they will do something for us.

When we do things this way, what happens?
  • Your sweetheart feels manipulated. They will begin to start asking, "What is it now?" every time you try and do something nice for them.
  • You will feel that your sweetie owes you the thing you want. If they don't give you what you want you will feel cheated.
  • It works to douse the romantic flame of the marriage.
Now, consider doing something special without any expectation in return. Cook his favorite meal, just because he likes it. Help with the chores just to be helpful.

Don't forget to smile to show you really love your sweetheart, even if you don't enjoy the task. Remember to keep special things special.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

V.I.P.

Imagine you were going to meet someone very important. It could be someone famous, your boss or someone else you would like to impress. How would prepare for such a meeting? You would go all out to look your best and make a good impression.

Isn't your sweetie a very important person? Every now again, prepare yourself for your sweetheart like you would for that person you wanted to impress. Let your sweetie know how important he is to you.