Monday, October 18, 2004

100-100

We often hear that a marriage should be 50-50. Each partner should
contribute half to the relationship. By implication, each partner
would then withhold 50% from the relationship as well. Consider a
football team. If each member of the team does his half best, would
this team go very far?

A marriage is the ultimate team. Each member of the team needs to
give it 100%. The husband needs to be 100% dedicated to the wife and
the wife 100% dedicated to the spouse and both need to be 100%
dedicated to the marriage. Just as players on a football team need to
be 100% dedicated to the team.

"Wait!" you say, "I can add. 100% + 100% = 200% How can a single
person give 200%. That's just crazy talk". Welcome to the concept
of synergy. By dedicating yourself completely to your spouse, and
your spouse doing the same, you create synergy.

You are able to do more as a team than either of you can do alone.
Its like in those war movies when one soldier says "I got your back".
They then stand back to back and face the oncoming enemy. Each knows
he doesn't need to worry about what's behind him as his partner has
that under control.

In a marriage, each partner is responsible for certain tasks. On a
football team there are different positions played by different
people. Each needs to know what is expected and trust the other team
members to do their part as well. By guarding each other's back, you
and your sweetie can remain 100% focused on the position you have to
fill in the relationship knowing that you won't be blindsided because
your partner has his postilion filled as well.

Who decides what position each partner plays? What if you don't trust
your spouse to guard your back? Those are great a topics for other
days.
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